Those smartypants!

The Watermelon Patch

There was a farmer who raised watermelons. He was doing pretty well, but he was plagued by local kids who would sneak into his patch at night and steal watermelons.

After some careful thought he comes up with a clever idea that he thinks will scare the kids away for sure. So he makes up a sign and posts it in the field. The sign says, “Warning, one of the watermelons in this field has been poisoned.”

The farmer goes to inspect his field the next morning and finds a new sign that says, “Warning, now two of the watermelons in this field have been poisoned.”.

Wall Photos

A group of elementary school students were on a field trip to the local police station. Several of the children were fascinated by the wanted posters on the wall.

Little Billy raised his hand and asked the police officer giving them the tour who the people on the wall were.

“Those are pictures of criminals we are looking for,” answered the policeman. “We call those wanted posters.”

Little Billy looked puzzled. His hand shot back up into the air.

“Well,” he wondered, “why didn’t you just keep them when you took their picture?”

Never Tell a Lie

A clergyman was walking down the street when he came upon a group of a few boys about 10 years of age, surrounding a dog. Concerned that the boys were hurting the animal, he went over and asked them what they were doing.

One of the boys replied, “This dog is an old neighborhood stray. We take him home with us sometimes, but since only one of us can take him home we’re having a contest: whichever one of us tells the biggest lie can take him home today.”

Of course, the Reverend was shocked.

“You boys shouldn’t be having a contest telling lies!” he exclaimed. He then launched into a 10-minute sermon against lying, beginning,

“Don’t you boys know it’s a sin to lie?” and ending with, “Why, when I was your age, I never told a lie.”

There was complete silence for about a minute while the boys all looked at each other and lowered their heads. Just as the Reverend began to think he had gotten through to them, the smallest boy gave a deep sigh and handed him the leash.

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